What Celebrities Are Doing

There’s only one thing that promises to be more tedious than the actual royal wedding, and that’s the person sitting next to you at whatever sparkling event you’re attending, telling you how much they hate it. Watching a balding, overprivileged geography graduate wandering through London for several hours is going to be dry enough without a drunk Jeremy McTwatface explaining how much it costs, “And it’s all coming out of our pockets!”. And yes, we do have someone in mind while we write this, and yes they do know who they are. McTwatface.

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