What Celebrities Are Doing

As much as you might like to do the coffee run in one, Elie Saab is ALL about the red carpet. Only the most stylish celebs chose his (yep, HIS) gowns for the Emmys, so we wouldn’t be at all surprised if some poor seamstress was frantically knocking up a few of these numbers for next month’s Oscars.

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After importing an iceberg the size of the fashion industry’s entire powder supply for his last ready-to-wear collection, how does Karl Lagerfeld top things for the SS 2012 haute couture show? By building an entire plane set complete with a164-foot aisle, 180-degree swivel seats for 250 ‘passengers’, monogrammed upholstery, a holographic cockpit and supermodels as the hostesses with the mostesses. That’s how.

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As you may have noticed if you were living on Earth last year, Versace did a collaboration with H&M that pretty much blew Cromwell Madhouse’s twenty year closing down sale right off the high street. It was very successful, but since a store’s stock probably costs less than the price of one haute couture garment, Donatella also decided to revisit that area after an eight year break from the catwalk. And here it is. Meh, we know we’re not exactly the target audience, but we’re not massively impressed with the citrus sculpting. Look, Donatella, Beyonce’s one of the few people who could get away with that basque and she’s going to spend the next year covered in baby puke.

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Poor old Bill Gaytten, he used to work for a Hitler loving pirate and now he’s getting slated for not doing his predecessor’s work well enough. He’s like that office temp whose name you could never remember but who you got to do all your work. One day he’ll snap and it won’t be pretty, but in the meantime here’s what he’s produced for the SS 2012 haute couture collection, which is pretty, although not massively spectacular. We like the ombre effect, while the 50s skirts got us excited for the new series of Mad Men (although then we remembered that by now we’re up to the 60s). 

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Cameron Diaz has been up to the old ‘spunk as hair gel’ trick again (did Sean Combs ejaculate in her hair? Diddy?), except this time it’s run down on her face to create a tight sheen which will only be removed by a Ciroc scrub. 

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By Bob Emanuel Jr. Over the past few years, the topic of retirement was a staple during many of Randy Couture’s interviews. Couture, 47, accomplished much during his mixed martial arts career.

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Step aside Anna Wintour, international fashion (a)muse Tara Reid has jetted into Paris for Haute Couture Fashion Week to show the Vogue set how it’s really done. We assume she was Jean Paul Gaultier’s muse anyway – looking at pic 3…

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