What Celebrities Are Doing

For a console that’s been out since March this year, the 3DS unfortunately hasn’t quite matched up to expectations. After a distinct lack of tent-pole titles on release, especially those of its parent company Nintendo, the 3DS hasn’t had the software around to show off it’s true potential. Which is a real shame.

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If we have to think about Nando’s at 3.30 in the afternoon, then so do you. Sweet Jesus we’re hungry. How come there’s four hours between breakfast and lunch, but almost seven between lunch and dinner? It’s ridiculous. 3.30 is the worst time in the whole day, and now we’ve got to look at that well fed bastard Olly Murs opening a new branch of Nando’s in Birmingham. Like we didn’t already feel bad about Christmas.

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You know when you’re at a party with your natty clutch and you’ve got a fruity cocktail but then the canapes come your way and you’re really hungry but you’ve got no spare hands so you have to eat straight from the tray like a dog and everyone looks at you in disgust and decides to never invite you to anything ever again? Well, Dannii Minogue has the ultimate solution so that it never happens again!

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“Justinjustinjustinweloveyoujustinmarrymejustin”  – a sentiment that has been shared by many over the past few days, ever since the sinister shadow of fatherhood raised its ugly fertile head out of Justin Bieber’s trousers. A shadow that arose after claims he had moved his penis both in and out of a woman’s vagina repeatedly, resulting in both ejaculation and eventually, new life. Questions had been raised about the veracity of these claims, but no answers had been given. UNTIL NOW.

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The music industry seems to be in real bad shape at the moment. Everything is super duper fucked up, and with so many musicians and big fat cat label bosses complaining about how unfair it is that nobody liked minidisc very much*, it doesn’t seem like anyone’s looking at the industry as a whole. Except Noel. Noel’s looking at it as a whole. Noel’s goal is to control the soul of the industry as a whole.

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So, how much for one of these then? Hopefully slightly less than the marked price, since it not only does it seem unable to turn corners, but it also looks like sitting on it for longer than about 10 minutes would give you Rickets. Still, the lights on the side look nice, don’t they? That’s got to be worth at least £20k alone.

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Washington, Sep 8 (IANS) The two Republican frontrunners, Mitt Romney and Rick Perry, launched their fight for the party presidential nomination clashing over job creation to health care to social security and more.

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