What Celebrities Are Doing

If you’re a single parent looking for love, we might have good news for you. Chantelle Houghton, a woman famous for being married to a man from a shit indie band for all of 9 months and then making a baby with a cage fighter who once married Katie Price, has launched a dating site! Yippee hoorah!

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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Though their relationship ended months ago, Chantelle Houghton and Alex Reid’s interpersonal drama continues to burn bright like a thousand suns. This is ostensibly down to them being just fascinating, fascinating people, but is more honestly due to the fact that they are willing to spill the beans on literally any aspect of their lives for a few column inches and the chance to have a headline that says something like “MY ALEX SHAME!” or “I HATE CHANTELLE HOUGHTON FOREVER IDST!” or “SEX DUNGEON IN MY HOUSE WHICH DIDN’T HAVE A DUNGEON LICENCE!”

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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Got any big plans for 2013? We’ll wager they aren’t as big as Chantelle Houghton, for our favourite Paris Hilton impersonator is planning on going under the knife for two (or maybe thre) plastic surgery procedures this year. That’s a breast reduction, a jaw re-alignment and a possible breast uplift.

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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On and on, the Alex Reid and Chantelle Houghton saga rumbles, on and ever on. Every week, a new accusation or revelation, and yet more details of Alex’s sexual preferences. We’d love to say we’re sick of it, but since we stopped watching Hollyoaks we need an occasional fix of barely-literate relationship drama, and goddamnit, Alex and Chantelle are doing their level best to deliver.

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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When did it become the done thing for celebs to pose as other (usually better) celebs for shit mags and shit telly? Whether it’s Lorraine Kelly as Cher, Natalie Cassidy as Lady Gaga or Wagner from X Factor as Heidi Klum, it’s always cringey, and a bit shit.

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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It’s happened, everyone. You were told to try and stop it and what did you do? Nothing, absolutely nothing. So all we’ve got to say is don’t come crying to us when you find yourself spending the rest of eternity roasting your own genitals over a fiery pit in Satan’s back garden. You deserve it. Especially you, man who keeps emailing us asking for members of HM to be fired for ‘failing to uphold journalistic standards’. Cunt.

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

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Chantelle Houghton and Alex Reid shouldn’t really be getting married. They’re not, how do you say, functional human beings. Sure, they’ve both got the right number of limbs and organs, they can both communicate and neither one has any obvious physical disability, but think about their children. No child should be born with that kind of burden. Remember everyone, intense, brutal stupidity isn’t just a problem for the individuals themselves, it’s something that society as a whole must deal with. We’re not suggesting eugenics here on HM (yet), but we’re just saying that dysgenics is just as bad. “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing”. That was about Chantelle and Alex if it was about anyone.

For the full story and all the pics go to Holy moly!

View full post on Holy Moly! – Breaking celebrity news, gossip & celeb pictures – Holy Moly!